A rant I just had to my Mum:
Look Mum, I wouldn't mind spiders if they came to me like:
SPIDER: *in an English accent* DING DONG. Oh good evening Madame, may I please use your lavatory?
ME: Sure, go ahead!
I mean, at least that way, I would know that they were there. But noooooooo, they just creep up on you like *jumps* ARGH! With their eight legs going everywhere and their eight eyes looking at you, I don't even know if they have eight eyes but they look so intimidating! *pauses to breathe* Arachnids these days mother.
All this because a spider sneaked into my bathroom and I tried to capture it with a glass... and ultimately failed to capture it with a glass. It was camouflaged, and it moved so damn quickly. It was a commando spider. I shall call him G.I. Go! Go! Go!
He's out now though, Dad banished him to... er.... outside.
Finally, my family is safe to pee another day.
Lauren xxx
P.S. If 'Pee Another Day' isn't the name of the next James Bond movie, I'll cry myself to sleep tonight.
